If I pick to read dub-con, I usually go in thinking of it in terms of "I/we wouldn't have done it under a normal situation, BUT it was awesome hot and we probably might do it again."

Since it is a fandom only concept, I find it mainly used to create situations where characters who wouldn't normally have sex, have sex, ala "sex pollen/love spell."

For me at least, it's a lot of- will this character be okay afterwards?

BUT I do get seriously pissed off if something is supposed to be dub-con, and is more clearly non-con. Don't get me started on what happens when people turn BDSM into non-con and call it dub con >.